Thursday, April 16, 2009
Oklahoma Weather
Don't put those warm coats away just yet. According to a co-worker I talked to a moment ago, Oklahoma had snow on June 3rd, 1969. I hear it didn't stick, though.
Wednesday, April 15, 2009
Listening
"The most important thing in communication is to hear what isn't being said."
Peter F. Drucker
Tuesday, April 14, 2009
Speaking the Truth Doesn't Matter
The goal of the gospel is not just the proclamation of truth. The goal of the gospel is life transformation through a relationship with God, a life that no longer is about you, but is lived for God's purposes.
Consequently, what matters is not to speak the truth only. For lives to be transformed, what matters is what other people hear (and what happens in response). We learned all the way back in speech communication that what a sender says is not automatically the same as what a recipient hears. The sender speaks from a set of experiences, uses a specific vocabulary, and speaks from a particular world view (I'm probably still missing some ingredients). The recipient will quite likely have a different vocabulary, very likely a different world view, and certainly a different set of experiences. That means that what I say is not automatically what you understand.
In addition to these differences, "noise" makes communication more difficult. Noise can be physical noise, such as other people talking, that causes me to misunderstand. Noise can be specific words that get me going, while you may mean a totally different thing.
If my wife comes into the kitchen on Saturday morning wearing a particular outfit, I may say, "Why did you wear that?" What I mean is, "I thought you were thinking about wearing that next Monday?" However, turns out that our son had a bad night, which I completely missed because I was quite tired and never woke up. She only slept about three hours and is completely exhausted, and a little flustered that I slept through it all. Not surprisingly, she has a headache, too. Does she hear "did you change your plans?" Possible, but not certain. She may just hear, "why do you have to wear that ugly thing?" Yes, this a fictive example.
I'll assume that we're agreed now that what one person says is not automatically understood in the same manner by another person. Let's assume I'm talking with another person about Jesus. He may actually be open to the gospel, though he also has some friends that are Buddhist, and whom he respects a lot. I start the conversation by pointing out the difference between a believer and an unbeliever. That's biblical language, isn't it? Turns out that today's society considers people of varying faiths all believers. My friend will quite possibly feel all his assumptions about narrow-minded, judgmental, we-have-the-truth Christians reinforced when I just put him, his Buddhist friend, and everyone else who doesn't think like me into the box, "unbelievers." It no longer matters what I say afterwards. The noise introduced through that unnecessary term just torpedoed whatever truth I may have to share.
That's why I examine what I say, what other people believe, and why I choose terms that express what I want to say without offending - inasmuch as I can. I am working on using the term non-Christian in the future. It expresses what I want to say just fine and avoids the unnecessary offense of "unbeliever."
So, yes, speaking the truth does matter ... if it is the first step. If it is the only step, it doesn't matter. Only if I speak the truth in such a manner that others hear the truth communicated in love, then speaking the truth matters. Speaking the truth so as to be understood must take the other into account, and must be done in sensitivity to the other.
Consequently, what matters is not to speak the truth only. For lives to be transformed, what matters is what other people hear (and what happens in response). We learned all the way back in speech communication that what a sender says is not automatically the same as what a recipient hears. The sender speaks from a set of experiences, uses a specific vocabulary, and speaks from a particular world view (I'm probably still missing some ingredients). The recipient will quite likely have a different vocabulary, very likely a different world view, and certainly a different set of experiences. That means that what I say is not automatically what you understand.
In addition to these differences, "noise" makes communication more difficult. Noise can be physical noise, such as other people talking, that causes me to misunderstand. Noise can be specific words that get me going, while you may mean a totally different thing.
If my wife comes into the kitchen on Saturday morning wearing a particular outfit, I may say, "Why did you wear that?" What I mean is, "I thought you were thinking about wearing that next Monday?" However, turns out that our son had a bad night, which I completely missed because I was quite tired and never woke up. She only slept about three hours and is completely exhausted, and a little flustered that I slept through it all. Not surprisingly, she has a headache, too. Does she hear "did you change your plans?" Possible, but not certain. She may just hear, "why do you have to wear that ugly thing?" Yes, this a fictive example.
I'll assume that we're agreed now that what one person says is not automatically understood in the same manner by another person. Let's assume I'm talking with another person about Jesus. He may actually be open to the gospel, though he also has some friends that are Buddhist, and whom he respects a lot. I start the conversation by pointing out the difference between a believer and an unbeliever. That's biblical language, isn't it? Turns out that today's society considers people of varying faiths all believers. My friend will quite possibly feel all his assumptions about narrow-minded, judgmental, we-have-the-truth Christians reinforced when I just put him, his Buddhist friend, and everyone else who doesn't think like me into the box, "unbelievers." It no longer matters what I say afterwards. The noise introduced through that unnecessary term just torpedoed whatever truth I may have to share.
That's why I examine what I say, what other people believe, and why I choose terms that express what I want to say without offending - inasmuch as I can. I am working on using the term non-Christian in the future. It expresses what I want to say just fine and avoids the unnecessary offense of "unbeliever."
So, yes, speaking the truth does matter ... if it is the first step. If it is the only step, it doesn't matter. Only if I speak the truth in such a manner that others hear the truth communicated in love, then speaking the truth matters. Speaking the truth so as to be understood must take the other into account, and must be done in sensitivity to the other.
Monday, April 13, 2009
Building to Last
No institution can possibly survive if it needs geniuses or supermen to manage it. It must be organized in such a way as to be able to get along under a leadership composed of average human beings.
Peter F. Drucker
Wednesday, April 1, 2009
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